As I have mentioned before, my fellowship in Cambodia has been far more entrepreneurial than I ever thought it would be. I'm working on complex solutions to complex problems, constantly thinking on my feet, building my network from scratch, and using that network to acquire the resources I need to succeed. Furthermore, I have been building some very productive habits that I will carry with me when I return home to Stillwater. Among those habits, I have become an extremely avid reader, and in this post I would like to share a few of the lessons I have learned from the thousands of pages I have read since I arrived here.
1.) The first lesson I would like to share is that smiling may be the most important thing you can do, both for your general well-being, as well as your interactions with people. A wise man by the name of Jamaluddin once told me that I always have a smile on my face, and I have attributed this quality to my success with getting along with pretty much anyone. Even as I pass strangers on the dirt roads of Cambodia, a smile is always well received. It is the "hello" of the universal language. If you want to make that great first impression, your best bet is to smile.
Smiling can even help you when you feel like shit! It may sound crazy, but if you find yourself in a terrible mood, force yourself to smile and you will actually feel better. As the pscyhologist and philosopher William James said, "Action seems to follow feeling, but really action and feeling go together; and by regulating the action, which is under the more direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not." So turn that frown upside-down!
2.) Take interest in other people, genuine interest. Face it, humans are selfish creatures, we all look out for number one, and we love to hear ourselves talk. No matter how unselfish you claim to be, I bet you enjoy that feeling when someone is genuinely interested in that trip you just took or how your day at work went. I know how well this works from experience.
During my freshman year of college, I worked for a brief time as a limousine detailer. And for the record, I worked here for a short time because the job sucked so much it motivated me to look for another, and it resulted in me working for Porsche, so I can't complain too much! I worked here during the time I was taking Hal's Mind of the Entrepreneur class, which had an assignment for which we had to interview an entrepreneur. Since the current president of the limousine company was the original founder, I decided to interview him.
Not only did I complete my assignment, but I unknowingly strengthened my relationship with my boss much faster than with hard work alone. He even brought up the idea of me becoming a driver once I had all my certifications in check (little did I know I'd be driving Porches instead of limos). The moral of the story is, take interest in other people. You will learn a great deal and create lasting relationships as a result.
3.) The third and final lesson I will share today is about arguing. I have always hated it. If you win, you lose, and if you lose, you lose. Doesn't that sound awful? When you argue your point to no end, it may make you feel high and mighty, but surely you have put the other person down, and that doesn't accomplish anything. In fact, you are most certainly worse off than if you had just backed down.
"A man convinced against his will. Is of the same opinion still."
So next time you find yourself in disagreement with someone, follow these tips:
- Don't disregard the disagreement, welcome it: "When two partners always agree, one of them is not necessary."
- Listen to the other person's point of view, and understand it fully.
- See on which points you can agree.
- Admit when you're wrong.
- Don't take action right away, come back after you have carefully taken into account the other side of the argument.
As the ever-wise Benjamin Franklin said,
"If you argue and rankle and contradict, you may achieve a victory sometimes; but it will be an empty victory because you will never get your opponent's good will."
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